21 Comments

leaving Martha Stewart aside - which I am reluctant to do as she is clearly still very upset about the husband who left her...... I too have narrow ear canals. This shouldn't turn into one upmanship but I earned mine surfing in freezing cold water around Wellington as a kid (the bones narrow to protect the ear. But the worst part was getting my hearing back in one ear at the Southern Cross Hotel in Wellington when the most boring man in the Southern Hemisphere was talking to me.

Expand full comment
author

Hahahaha! Oh GARD. This is hysterical

Expand full comment

Ear wax big as a small bumble bee, Martha Stewart and Joan Didion. Perfect, Leah!

Expand full comment

Great column Leah. I took one of my boys to Ear Health back in the day when they could show the suctioning on a tv screen high in a corner of the room. I felt a bit ill looking at my son's ear, but he was a happier young man when they extracted a lump of wax bigger than a chocolate finger. I think I took a photo of it. I wont share it - it would put you off your chocolate finger, if you were eating one.

Expand full comment
author

I literally LIVE for anecdotes like this

Expand full comment

I recommend popping a couple of drops of olive oil into your ears for a couple of nights before you go for your next syringe. Not too much though, and it really helps to soften the wax. I have one narrow ear canal and know the problem well. I go once a year and like another person commented, Ear Health are great.

Expand full comment

A touch of literary bliss when I ought to be cooking dinner ☺️ Thank you Leah!

Expand full comment
author

Somebody else can cook! Thanks Catherine x

Expand full comment

My new favourite Substack!! Love it.

Expand full comment
author

Wow Kathryn! That means the world

Expand full comment

You crack me up. 🤣

Expand full comment

Funny ! Love this Leah

Try ear candling in Bali! Ouch…

I have narrow sinuses and teeth roots which means I need special equipment if I ever - god help me - need a root canal…

Expand full comment
author

Tiny teeth roots! Definitely bring that up at a dinner party Sarah

Expand full comment

OMG - I do too - but not the loss of hearing just narrowed ear canals. So annoyingly I have to wear ear-muff headphones as the trendy ones just fall out - again and again until finally they're never to be seen again. I suppose there are worse things in life - as the makers of Martha have highlighted. I almost burned the kitchen down carefully following her 'classic' recipe for crème caramel

Expand full comment
author

Snortles! Wouldn't it be great if Martha told everyone that in fact, she hates cooking?

Literally EVERYONE has narrow ear canals. I need a new fact

Expand full comment

‘Oh my you do have very narrow ear canals’ doesn’t have the same cachet as “‘Oh my what slender ankles you have”

New Fact? Don’t get me started on hyenas!

Expand full comment

I'm a massive fan of ear suctioning or ear-valeting as I call it. From about the age of 50 I've had to go regularly as my aging ears betray me and gum up at the most inconvenient of times. Usually right before a long weekend. Ear Health are fantastic and have a bunch of clinicians available so it's not too difficult to get an appointment. But I've never looked at what comes out! Bravo to you!

Expand full comment
author

It was the best part! You need to prepare yourself for shock, however

Expand full comment

Oh Leah how I adore this.

Expand full comment
author

And I adore YOU.

Expand full comment

Witty, amusing, always entertaining. Love it.

Expand full comment